I, Brobot
by GaDS2000
Summary: Retroville becomes an idyllic society when its resident billionaire boy, Eustace Stritch, begins manufacturing thousands of Brobot imitations for the citizens despite Jimmy's warnings.
1. Prologue

A Glitch in Time

I, Brobot

by Gary D. Snyder

Prologue

"Knight takes pawn." In conjunction with this pronouncement the mechanical claw hovering over the chessboard descended, removed the hapless pawn from the board, and placed the opposing knight in its place. "Black threatens mate. White should retreat."

The computer's human opponent scrutinized the board, refusing to believe what he had heard. "Bishop takes queen," he replied, moving the pieces accordingly.

"Rook to A8. Check." The claw again descended to advance the appropriate piece. "Mate in two."

The White player studied the board and finally saw the trap baited by Black's queen sacrifice. After the white bishop returned to shield his king, the marauding knight would advance to force his king into a corner and Black's second knight would finish the job. After searching futilely for some way out, the human rose to his feet and announced his move. "White demolishes Black."

There was a brief moment of silence as the computer tried to digest this. "That does not compute."

"It will." The human raised the chair on which he had been sitting and brought it down with all his might on the chess apparatus. He repeated this several times, leaving the chessboard, chess pieces, and intricate circuitry a shattered ruin before he tossed the chair aside and dusting his hands. "Make a fool of Eustace Stritch, will you?" he challenged the smoking electronics. "Well, who's laughing now?"

Other than some sputters and pops the demolished circuits were silent.

Eustace surveyed the wreckage with satisfaction. "I thought as much. Blix!"

The manservant popped through the door like a genie from a bottle. "Yes,_ Mein Herr?_"

"Contact our cybernetics division and tell them to keep working on their chess computer," Eustace ordered. "It still won't let me win."

"But Mein Herr, the objective of a chess computer is to win," protested Blix. "If they build a computer that _lets_ you win there would be no purpose in building it."

"Don't argue with me!" the boy fumed. "Get them on it. I want it here by tomorrow morning."

Blix sighed. "Whatever you say."

"Precisely. Whatever _I_ say. And after you've done that, dispose of this…failure."

"_Jawohl, Mein Herr._" The servant left, mumbling something in German beneath his breath as he went.

Eustace paced back and forth in growing irritation. _What a world of fools in which I live_, he thought. _How hard could it possibly be for people to do exactly what I want? It isn't, after all, as though they'd have to make any decisions. I'd have already done all that, and making decisions is the hard part in anything._ The smell of smoke in the room grew stronger, interrupting his thoughts and making him cough. He'd have to remember to have Blix air out the room after he disposed of the smashed robot. But even as the thought crossed his mind he realized that the smell of smoke was different. Almost like…tobacco?

"Hello, Eustace."

Eustace didn't have to look to know who it was. "How did you get in here?"

"Any wall is a door, if you know where to push."

Eustace turned slowly to face the cigarette-smoking man. "And being pushy is your forte, isn't it?"

Smoke dribbled out of the man's nose as he considered the remark. "In my profession it comes in handy." He gestured towards the pile of electromechancial debris. "Having some problems with your chess computer?"

"No. No problems. Why?"

The man shrugged. "Because I have a pressing need for some advanced cybernetics that you can deliver. And…" He paused to take a long drag on the cigaretted to underline his next comment. "…You still owe me a favor. A big one, as you recall."

That brought a frown to Eustace's face. "I paid you well. Especially considering that your efforts failed miserably."

Nothing seemed to fluster the man, who simply smiled. "You set the parameters, and were told that there was no guarantee of success. And all you paid for was the time and equipment. You still owe for the opportunity."

Although the smile unnerved him more than did the man's usually stoic visage Eustace simply sighed, trying to appear bored. "And what exactly do I owe?"

The man crushed out the stub of his cigarette and withdrew a fresh one from a crumpled pack. "As I said, I need some access to some advanced cybernetics. As your experience showed, there were some problems with our players that need correction. In particular, they need to be more flexible. I need a robot that that is able to compensate for unexpected factors and extrapolate courses of action from previous experiences."

"In short, you want a robot that can think."

"In so many words, yes."

Eustace's reaction was something halfway between a snort and a laugh. "Forget it. My cybernetics research division is years away from that sort of thing. Not even the pure advanced research laboratories are close to it. No one is."

"Really?" The man snapped open a lighter, worn smooth from years of use, and lit the cigarette dangling from his lips. "I understand there's someone right here in town who's made remarkable strides in the field."

"You mean _Neutron_?" Eustace spat out the last word as though it were something distasteful.

"None other. Consider that robotic dog of his. As I understand it, it beat one of your RA units."

"That was a fluke."

The man smiled again, seeming this time to be amused. "Then why have you been trying to get Neutron's dog for so long?"

"Because it's the best!" Eustace shot back. "And I deserve the best! I always deserve the best!" After a short time he succeeded in mastering his temper and went on. "And suppose I did manage to find some way to get Neutron's dog. What would you want with it?"

The cigarette-smoking man simply regarded the boy in front of him and let a stream of smoke escape his nostrils. "Oh, I could tell you," he replied, watching the wisp of smoke slowly dissipate, "but then…"

"But then you'd have to kill me." Eustace began to laugh at the old joke, but the laugh grew weaker and more nervous when the man didn't join in. Another cloud of smoke drifted his way, and he broke into a fit of weak coughing before the man broke the increasingly uncomfortable silence.

"Just get me the robot. Or the information to build another one."

As intimidating as this ultimatum was it was better than the ominous silence the preceeded it. Eustace felt almost relieved to have something concrete to which he could respond. "Easier said than done," he scowled. "Despite our recent Arean truce Neutron would never trust me with his dog or any of its secrets so I could duplicate it. And trying to get anything useful out of his doltish friends is like talking to a brick wall."

The man seemed unperturbed. "As I said," he returned smoothly, finishing the cigarette with a final drag, "any wall is a door."

Eustace considered that and a thoughtful look came over his face as he began slowly to pace and the wheels began to turn. "If you know where to push." A crooked smile revealed the full extent of his oversized incisors. "And I can also be quite pushy when I want. Wouldn't you agree?" There was no answer and he turned in irritation to face the cigarette-smoking man. "I said…" he began, only to let the sentence die when he discovered that he was alone. He let out a long sigh and muttered in annoyance, "I hate it when he does that."

Blix re-entered the room with a broom and waste receptacle just in time to catch Eustace's remark. "I beg your pardon?"

"Never mind. Did you contact the cybernetics lab?"

"_Jawohl, Mein Herr_," Blix assured him. "They will have the next prototype here at 8 AM." He moved towards the destroyed equipment to remove it.

"Excellent." He stepped in front of his manservant to block his path. "Forget about cleaning up for a while. I have another assignment for you."

Blix was used to last minute changes. "_Ja, Mein Herr?_"

"Go to the surveillance room," Eustace instructed him. "I need to know where Neutron's friends are right now. I have a business proposition for them."

"A business proposition? With you?" Blix blinked in confusion. "Will they be interested, do you think?"

"Oh, indubitably. You might say," Eustace assured him in a consipiratorial whisper, "it would be a dog-gone shame if they refused."

End of Prologue

Author's Note:

Long-time readers, and I mean _really_ long-time readers since it's been nearly a year since I last posted anything, may recognize references in this story to my fanfic "The Neutron Show"as well as a reference to the more recent Nickelodeon episode "King of Mars" ("Arean" means "Martian"). If you don't, don't worry: you won't really need any background information to understand this story.


	2. Past, Present, and Future

A Glitch in Time

I, Brobot

by Gary D. Snyder

Chapter 1:

At the same time that Eustace was preparing his plans, Jimmy was in the Candy Bar absorbed in research and trying to ignore Sheen and Carl's interruptions.

"Hey, Jimmy! Can we go mini-golfing on Mercury today?"

Jimmy didn't even look up from the small device on which he had been concentrating. "No, Sheen."

"Well, how about going to South America and looking for new breeds of llamas?" suggested Carl.

"No, Carl."

"Use the Game Pyramid?"

"Nope."

"Visit Shangri-Llama?"

"Sorry."

"Can't we even go back to the Dark Ages to light matches and predict eclipses and pretend we're gods and stuff?" pleaded Sheen.

"Absolutely not."

Sheen threw himself backward on the padded bench. "But I'm _bored_!" he complained.

"And I'm bored that he's bored," added Carl.

"Then why don't you work on that make-up exam that Miss Fowl gave us because we missed the geography test a couple weeks ago?" Jimmy suggested. "That should keep you occupied for a while."

"Because I want to stop being bored." Sheen pulled himself upright in the booth to drop his elbows on the table and rest his chin in his hands. "There are plenty of things around to keep me bored."

Jimmy stopped manipulating the gadget in his hand to address them directly. "Sheen, you're not really bored. Your mind's inherent inability to focus on a specific subject for more than a few minutes at a time is simply fostering an illusory lack of interest and causing you to promulgate an exaggerated sense of ennui."

Carl stared blankly at Jimmy, his mouth agape, while Sheen simply blinked. "Okay, _now_ I'm bored."

"I'm just saying," Jimmy explained patiently, "that just sitting around complaining about being bored is going to make you think that you're bored no matter how you really feel."

"Well, I'd rather not just sit around," replied Sheen in a good parody of Jimmy's careful diction, "but a certain genius won't let us do anything fun."

Carl nodded in agreement. "Yeah, Jimmy, why can't we go someplace that's really fun for a while?"

"Or even visit Brobot and his folks?" added Sheen.

Jimmy sighed. "I already told you guys. After our last trip the Strato XL needs a major overhaul Aside from the battle damage and jury-rigging I had to do to it I've never pushed it that far that fast for that long. It would be dangerous to try flying it anywhere right now. I had to scavenge some parts from my hovercraft for us to make the initial flight so that's also out of commission for a while. And as for time travel…" He turned his attention back to the device he had been using and frowned. "Until I have a better idea of what's happening to the time stream I don't think we should be messing with it."

Despite his basic lack of comprehension Carl was nonetheless intrigued. "What do you mean?"

"Think of time as a river and that we're in boats travelling along. Sometimes it flows smoothly and sometimes it's rough, but as a rule it moves along at about the same rate in the same direction. But now…" Jimmy stared at the electronic data on the small screen and shook his head. "According to these readings, now it's like the river isn't flowing at all. It's like time is spraying in all directions, like a geyser or a waterspout."

Sheen craned his neck to study the changing display. "Just what do those numbers mean?"

"Those are anti-tachyons counts," Jimmy answered. "According to my fundamental theory of matter, most subatomic matter can be modeled as two smaller particles that are bound together. Under very specialized circumstances these two particles can be split apart. One particle travels faster than light as a tachyon, and to conserve the overall momentum, charge, spin, and other characteristics of the original matter the other particle travels slower than light and becomes an anti-tachyon. In the process the binding energy is released as a chroniton, or a time particle. Usually the process takes a lot of energy to initiate, like from a black hole hyperaccelerating an atom or maybe a supernova, and the number of anti-tachyons is fairly constant. But in the past few weeks the background anti-tachyon count has increased by nearly 0.3. Do you realize what this means?"

Carl answered slowly. "Is that question on next week's test? Because I really haven't had time to look over my handout and -"

Jimmy looked disgusted. "Do you guys even bother to read any of the papers I write? I send you complimentary copies of the scientific journals that publish them!"

"Well, sometimes," Sheen demurred. "At least the ones that have pictures to look at. I like to pretend that their evil aliens for Ultra Lord to defeat."

"I means," Jimmy went on, chiseling each word from ice, "that an increasing number of random chronitons are entering the time stream, disrupting the normal flow. But I can't tell whether it's natural or man-made, or what the effects are going to be."

"So what are going to do, Jimmy?"

"That's a good question, Carl." Jimmy thought for a few minutes before finally announcing, "I think that I'd better contact someone who has a good understanding of time."

"Hurray!" Sheen rejoiced. He leaped onto the bench and stabbed his forefinger into the air. "To the clock shop!"

Jimmy, however, remained seated, activated his wrist-comp, and selected a number from his contact list. After a moment the face of a young black boy about Jimmy's age appeared. "Hello? Oh, hi, Jimmy."

"Hey, Wade. Got a minute? "

Wade glanced over the various displays in his room and nodded. "It seems pretty quiet right now. What's up?"

"Have you been doing any time experiments lately?"

"Time experiments?" Wade shuddered and shook his head vigorously. "After that time complosion experience, time is the last thing I want to mess with for a while. Why do you ask?"

"Well…" Jimmy considered how best to approach the subject. "Could you check the Internet for anything odd that's related to time or time research?"

"Easier said than done." Wade did some rapid typing and studied the information that scrolled across his monitor. After a few seconds he forwned. "Nothing really significant…but there is one thing that's rather odd. According to the some of the major labs their atomic clocks seem to be getting in and out of synch with the master clock at the International Bureau of Standards. The differences are on the order of picoseconds, but definitely measurable. It's as though each clock sometimes runs faster or slower than the others. But…" Wade stopped to think of the implications. "…that means that either the fundamental nature of matter is changing so that each cesium atom is oscillating at a different rate, or that the clocks are no longer in the same inertial frame of reference so that time itself is passing at different rates."

"Or that some of them are being randomly hit with chronitons?" Jimmy asked.

Wade considered that. "Yes, I suppose that's theoretically possible. Although I have no idea why something would be randomly generating chronitons."

"That makes two of us," Jimmy muttered.

"Say what?"

"Nothing. So…" Jimmy took a ddep breath. "How's Kim? And Ron," he added hastily.

Wade shrugged. "Doing okay. Ever since they became an item things have gotten a little samey, but generally good."

"I see. Umm...does she…I mean, they…ever ask about, you know…" He drew another breath. "…me? And Cindy, of course."

"What?" It took Wade a second to catch on. "Oh. No. Not really. But, you know, what with senior year and graduation, her schedule – I mean their schedules – are pretty booked. But I'll tell them you called. They'll be thrilled. Really."

"Yeah." Jimmy sighed. "Yes, sure. Well, take it easy."

"You too. I'll let you know if I find out anything else about weird time anomalies. Out."

The screen went blank and Jimmy realized that Sheen and Carl were staring at him with peculiar expressions. "What?" he demanded.

"Nothing," Carl hastily assured him.

"Nothing at all," Sheen agreed. "It's not like we're your girlfriend. Ask about other girls all you want. Do you want to know how Betty Quinlan is doing?"

"Yes. I mean, no." Jimmy went on the offensive. "And what do you mean, 'girlfriend'?"

"Well…you know. Cindy." Carl swallowed nervously before proceeding. "Kissing. Girlfriend. You know."

"She's not my girlfriend!" Jimmy objected. "And we haven't been kissing. Much."

Sheen scoffed. "Are you kidding? You've been getting more lip action than Coach Gruber's CPR dummy. Which is actually quite a lot," he added thoughtfully. "I've heard some of the girls asking if he has a brother."

"That's not true," protested Jimmy.

"About the dummy?" asked Carl.

"About everything! Cindy is my friend. Yes. Yes, I can admit that. And she's a…girl. But she's just someone I like. Someone who's smart…and funny, when she isn't making fun of me…and that I can trust…and smells nice…" Jimmy's voice grew more distant and his expresson became dreamy. "And is pretty…and dresses nice…and has the softest…" He caught himself and glared at Carl and Sheen. "But she's not my girlfriend!"

"Oh, come on, Jimmy. Ever since we took that trip to Mars, you and she -"

A familiar and irritatingly affected voice interrupted Sheen."Well, if it isn't my old chums. How is everything?"

Sheen stared at Eustace, wide-eyed. "Wow. Talk about convenient timing. We were just talking about the time we last saw you. What are you doing here, Useless?"

"Please, call me Eustace." Eustace's jaw tightened and his voice hardened, but the grimace on his face could still be interpreted as a smile.

"Why?"

"Because it's my name," he snapped. "And after all," he continued in a calmer tone, "we're all friends."

Carl looked puzzled. "Since when?"

Eustace laughed loudly. "Ah, yes. Ever the epitome of drollery, aren't you…" He stole a quick look at the crib notes Blix had prepared for him before finishing the sentence. "…'Sheen'?"

"I'm Sheen," said Sheen.

"Of course you are. Sheen, and Jimmy, and…" Eustace took another quick look at his notes. "…and 'the other one'. So many happy memories together, eh?"

Jimmy refused to be taken in. "What do you want, Stritch?"

"Want? I have everything. Why should I want anything?"

"Because for people like you," Jimmy replied, "'some' is never enough."

_All too true_, Eustace thought. But all he said was, "Surely you don't believe that?"

"And why shouldn't I?" Jimmy shot back. "Ever since we've met, you've always been after something. First it was Goddard. Then it was trying to kill me and my friends. And then it was the hydroquantum energy source. You're after something now. I can smell it. Just what is it this time?"

Eustace forced a laugh. "Oh, nonsense, Jimmy. I mean, we did face danger together and leave Mars together on good terms, didn't we? Is it so strange that I'd feel a bond of cameraderie and want to spend some time with my…" He barely managed to force the word out of his throat. "….best friends?"

Jimmy got up to leave. "Let's go, guys." He started towards the door with Sheen and Carl trailing behind him.

"And share a financial opportunity that would make them rich beyond their wildest dreams?" Eustace called after them. Jimmy was already out the door but Carl and Sheen stopped short.

"'Rich'?" Carl echoed.

"'Wildest dreams'?" repeated Sheen.

"Well, yes," Eustace oozed. "In my economic situation there are dozens - hundreds, really - of financial opportunities that need only the merest trifle to bring them to fruition. And after our close call on Mars in which you all played some small part in our fortuitous extrication, I felt that you deserved something of my magnanimity in furthering your own fortunes as a reward of sorts."

Both Carl and Sheen stared blankly at Eustace.

"'Rich'?" Carl said again.

"'Wildest dreams'?" Sheen asked hopefully.

_How does Neutron stand this without going insane?_ Eustace thought. _It's like dealing with talking dust bunnies._ But he just smiled reassuringly. "Yes, more money than you could spend in a dozen lifetimes. All it takes is some imagination and a little help from you to bring it all to pass."

Carl and Sheen drew closer. "Like what?" asked Carl.

"Well, just as an example, I'm sure that you've been to places that very few people have visited. Think of the money they'd pay to go there."

"Oh, yeah," Sheen agreed. "Like the Bahama Quadrangle."

Carl nodded. "Or Shangri-Llama."

"And remember when we went to -"

"Or," Eustace loudly interrupted, "some of the wonderful things you've seen that we could manufacture and market. Like alien contraptions on other worlds, for example."

Sheen's brow furrowed in thought. "Like what?" he asked.

Eustace feigned indifference. "Things like anti-gravity flying machines. Teleportation devices." He paused for a second before proceeding. "Robots."

"Oh, yeah. Like Bubo," Carl suggested.

"Or VeeAytch One," added Sheen.

"Or Goddard," Eustace slipped in.

"Ah-HAH!" Jimmy, who had backtracked in time to hear Eustace's last comment. stormed towards the three. "I knew you were after something, Stritch! So it's Goddard again, is it? With everything you have you just can't rest until you get your claws on something that isn't yours, can you?"

"Don't be a fool, Neutron," Eustace snapped back. "That dog is worth millions – maybe tens or hundreds of millions. Think of all the applications that robots like him could fulfill. Exploration. Search and rescue. Companionship. Security. Babysitting. Even personal servants. Keeping that technology for yourself is a crime against humanity. Not to mention to your friends who could profit from it. But it seems that keeping your precious secrets means more to you than helping them does."

Jimmy seethed silently for long a moment before he finally said, "My friends know better than that. You aren't getting Goddard or any information about him." He glared at Sheen and Carl, who had been looking from Jimmy to Eustace and back again. "And neither Carl or Sheen will tell you anything they know about him either. _Right?_"

Carl sighed in disappointment. "Right."

"Yeah, right," Sheen agreed wistfully.

Jimmy turned to leave but swung back with a parting shot. "And just remember this, Stritch. Things don't always turn out exactly the way you think they will. Dr. Frankenstein found that out a little too late with his creation. Take the hint."

Eustace watched Jimmy stalk out of the Candy Bar, fuming. "And what would he know about it?" he snorted.

"A lot," Carl answered. "There was this candy that Jimmy made once that no one could stop eating."

"And don't forget that enhanced sun block that started a new ice age," Sheen reminded him.

Carl snorted a laugh. "Or those spicy nanochips that took over everyone's pants."

Sheen was laughing now as well. "And his little robot brother that even Jimmy's parents liked better than him."

"Or -" Carl began, but Eustace cut him off.

"Robot brother?"

"Oh, Brobot. Yeah." Sheen grinned at the memory. "At first Jimmy had a lot of fun with him. But then Brobot started to get irritating so Jimmy got rid of him."

"He took this Brobot apart?"

"Oh, no." Carl shook his head. "No, no, no. Brobot was his brother, sort of. Jimmy gave Brobot a Mombot and Popbot and sent them away."

"I see." Eustace posed the next question with carefully calculated nonchalance. "And just where did Jimmy send them?"

"Umm…" Carl looked uncomfortable. Jimmy had not told him and Sheen not to tell Eustace anything about Brobot, but long years of bullying had helped him develop a keen sense of when someone was setting a trap for him. "I don't think Jimmy would want us to talk about that anymore."

Sheen nodded. "I think Carl's right. We'd better not talk about that."

"Really?" Eustace shrugged and snapped his fingers. At the pre-arranged signal Sam approached with a wheeled cart, upon which was an Atomic Chocoblast, the Candy Bar's most opulent offering. Carl and Sheen watched the massive confection approach with glazed eyes and open and slightly drooling mouths. Eustace scraped a spoonful of the frozen treat from the massive mound and waved it in front of the two rapt boys, who followed the every movement as though hypnotized. "Suppose we discuss just where this Brobot and his parents are while you're finishing your treat. And then we can think about everything you'll be doing with your huge piles of money."

End of Chapter 1


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